I Don't Blog Naked

Major benefit of being a blogger: you don't have a dress code. Most days I roll out of bed, wash my face, brush my teeth, and grab my laptop. Now don't go spreading internet rumors - I don't blog in my birthday suit.

I've had to "get dressed for work" twice this month. I share pics of my outfits on Facebook, so I figured why not share them here with you too.

photo courtesy of Body Central (bodyc.com)

 I had my eye on the vest pictured above for about two years now. I kept waiting for it to go on sale, but it never did. Until now. It's on clearance.

I already had the other pieces to recreate this look, but I couldn't find a vest at a price I was willing to pay. Until now. Thank you, Ross Dress for Less!

 

I picked up my shrug for $8.99 which is still a buck less than Body Central's clearance price. Scored the tank from Rue21 (two for $10) - my favorite spot for tanks because they don't lose their shape and are always on sale. My black wide leg pants are from Gap...got em a few years ago when a store was closing at a local mall.

I wore these - part of my collection thanks to lay-away at T.J.Maxx:

Franco Sarto shoes from T.J.Maxx

I think I got them two summers ago. Maybe, but don't quote me. I just know they aren't brand spankin' new. I checked the bottom to get the price, but it was torn off. My guess is they were between $29.99 - $39.99. Not bad considering similar sandals are $69.99.

I wore this outfit to the Do You Naturally Expo yesterday where I presented a topic on entrepreneurship. 

Here I am with author and speaker Erika Gilchrist:

Here I am again with KXAN meteorologist Rhonda Lee who talked about her natural hair journey as a media professional, along with expo host, Veola Jolly.

I can't remember the last time I shopped for something to wear to an event. Whenever I see affordable, versatile pieces that would compliment my wardrobe I pick them up. It's so much easier and cost effective than running out buying something every time you have to make an appearance.

I'm gonna get my 8.99 worth out of this shrug! Not only will I wear it again, but I'll be photographed in it too!

Guess what?! Due to the overwhelming response to this post, I started a personal style blog. But it's not just any personal style blog. Go on..click here to check it out!

Today's Video: Don't Wait For The Slam Dunk

I've been guilty of this. I would justify it by telling myself I hadn't quite earned the right yet...I had to keep my nose to the grind so I wouldn't lose focus.*

If you can't see the video CLICK HERE.

On those really challenging days when it seems like nothing is going your way (had one of them myself yesterday), you have to look a little harder to find the victory. It doesn't always show up as a win...sometimes it's just a matter of deciding to stay in the game.

*I inadvertently said I was contacted by entities who want to work FOR me when I should've said they were interested in working WITH me.*

Mama Knows Best...You Should Know Better

As I sit here at the kitchen table, I keep reflecting on a comment my friend Zara made on her Facebook page recently. It's not verbatim, but it boiled down to her saying we should let go of some of the beliefs our parents ingrained in us and adopt our own. Neither one of us could remember the context in which she said it, so I'm going to give you an example of how it relates to me.

Sunday dinner was a big thing when I was growing up. My mama would ask the day before what I wanted and that's what she'd cook. It was never anything simple. That's not how traditional Sunday dinners are supposed to be. Often times it consisted of something freshly picked from a friend's garden and was the epitome of southern soul food. Alot like what my dinner is today. 

I seasoned the pork chops and turkey wings last night. Sundays are reserved for two meats, a green vegetable, a starch, and a wildcard side dish (but not a starch because double starches are a sin). Even if it's the hottest day of summer, you have to turn the oven on because dinner ain't complete without cornbread.

Did you know if you drop a fork on the floor while you're cooking, it means someone is gonna show up unexpectedly...hungry?! Heaven help you if you don't have enough to feed them! 

The turkey wings are in the crockpot and the chops are still resting in the fridge. It's not time to cook those yet because everything has to be ready and hot - at the same time. No microwaves on Sunday unless you're warming up seconds. The hand-selected cabbage from the produce section at Wal-Mart is prepped and will be last on the stove. Overcooking makes it mushy and you lose all the nutrients.

The Zatarain's Dirty Rice counts as a starch. Even though you add ground beef, it's not a third meat. The only prepackaged thing mama cooked on Sunday was Corn-Kits cornbread. She never could quite learn from her mama how to make it from scratch. And by the way, Jiffy ain't real cornbread because cornbread ain't supposed to be sweet. I've been rebellious my whole life so I add sugar and melted butter to mine.

One time mama called and asked what I was cooking. I said tacos. She said, "Tacos on a Sunday? That's a Friday or Saturday meal". She didn't give me a chance to tell her I was making boxed spanish rice and the lettuce and tomatoes counted as vegetables. Not garden fresh, but fresh enough and I had cut them myself.  She obviously missed the memo that my generation doesn't go near the stove on the weekend and if we do, there's a good chance whatever we're preparing contains chopped and frozen onions, celery, and bell peppers.  

About eleven years ago I hosted my first Thanksgiving dinner. My friend Charlene told me to serve mushrooms. She said put them in the oven and add steak seasoning and they'd taste just like steak. My niece hasn't stopped asking for them since. I wish she was here today because it ain't nowhere near the fourth Thursday in November and I'm getting real fancy. Adding sweet golden tomatoes and red onions, cooking them on top of the stove.

I continue to evolve as an individual and as a cook. I still heed what mama says, both in and out of the kitchen, but part of the wisdom she imparted on me is knowing when to lean on her teachings and when it's best to embrace and apply my own.

My Mid-Life Addiction

Remember when I won that gorgeous bag from Bangle and Clutch? Well, Nannette Bosh Inc. liked my video so much they returned the favor and invited me to write a guest post. They ran into some snags getting it up on their site and that's why I'm sharing it here so you can read it:

I thought long and hard about adding the word ‘Strange’ to the title of this post, but decided against it since I don’t eat toilet paper, sleep with blow dryers, or play wife to a man blow-up doll. Is my addiction real? Oh hell yes. Is it strange? Hardly not..

I was raised in the south by a woman who had three daughters. I’m the youngest. As part of our upbringing, we walked with books balanced on our heads because ladies have good posture, ate properly with a knife and fork (even if your food didn’t need to be cut up) because ladies have good table manners, and if we left the house without earrings, we were subject to lose an ear. Because a lady would rather die than get caught without earrings.

Somehow, over the past 39 years, the urge to have a foreign object dangling from my lobes – hoops are my drug of choice…the bigger the better – has spiraled out of control.

I’ve always had the potential to become a heavy user and I got strung out about five or so years ago. I didn’t start off doing the hard stuff. I had enough sense to know that could be deadly. So I’d just throw on a necklace here and there. Then another. And another. Before I knew it, I was mixing and matching and layering every chance I got. I couldn’t step foot out the door without experimenting. I was never a designer kind of girl. I found myself gravitating more toward the recreational, costume stuff.

As I added more poison to the almost fatal concoction, it became harder to function. The only thing I could focus on was my next fix. Everything I did centered around picking the right ring, bangle, and/or cuff. I thought I’d hit rock bottom when I got introduced to scarves and the mere thought of a trendy handbag sends me into a cold sweat.

Then the dealers started playing dirty. The got more creative with how they marketed the goods to defenseless addicts like me. They turned to twitter and Facebook and used giveaways to lure you in.

I refuse to seek treatment though. Either inpatient, outpatient, or otherwise. I can beat this thing. Single handedly. One rhinestone and clutch at a time.

Real Geeks Don't Cry

My technological prowess isn't all that advanced, but I strive to make improvements. Sometimes it consists of something as simple as learning a new feature on my two-year old Samsung phone.

I outsource video editing to The Girl. She's good at it. I'm not. She enjoys doing it. I never tried it until today, but I knew in advance I didn't like it.

In an attempt to streamline processes at Headquarters, I'm slowly transitioning from the desktop that's on its last leg. The only thing it's good for is about six straight hours of Runescape. I'm consolidating all blogging functions on my laptop. 

Today I learned how to:

1. convert a .wlmp to a .wmv (you save the file as a movie - don't save it as a project)
2. edit the beginning and end of a video (I'm gonna be dangerous when I learn how to do the middle!)

I celebrated briefly. And then pronounced myself brain dead.



photo: Rakka

Tutti Frutti Tonga

O.P.I. Tutti Frutti Tonga is a light peachy-pink shimmer polish color

Blogging from my bed instead of The Crackhouse is a beautiful thing. I appreciate the hospitality the staff showed me, but I prefer Headquarters. However, I will make it a point to work from my other campus at least once a week.

I was sitting on the floor watching Lifetime Movie Network when I should have been writing my monthly post for The Work at Home Woman. An hour and forty-five minutes into Seduced by Lies gave me the sudden urge to go get a pedicure.

I'll have to catch the last fifteen minutes to see if What's-Her-Name killed the new boyfriend who murdered her best friend and tried to convince her it was really her ex-boyfriend who was kinda stalking her too.

CLOSED FOR BUSINESS

At 4:52pm, I reached for my phone to call Annie's Nails & Spa. They do my feet and eyebrows. I don't particularly care for manicures. Andy, the owner, answered:

Me: What time do you close?
Andy: Now. You can come tomorrow?!
Me: No. Justin won't be there tomorrow. Thank you though.
Andy: Ok. Come now.
Me: Thaaank youuuu, Andy! You'll know me when I get there.
Andy: I don't know you.
Me: Ok...I'm on my way!

When I walked in, Andy was doing nails. He looked up and said, "Oh - it's you." I'm certain he was excited, but I'm reluctant to put an ! at the end of his sentence statement.

JUSTIN IS HI

Andy asked who I wanted to do my pedicure and I pointed and said, "Justin". Maybe the smell of acrylic was getting to him because I know I told him that on the phone. Justin finished up with his customer and came over to start on me. That young man rubs my feet like nothing I've ever felt before! As Justin was walking me over to sit my toes under the table light, Andy struck up a conversation:

Andy: What's his name? (pointing to Justin)
Me: Justin
Andy: No it's not
Me: Yes, yes it is. His name is Justin. (looking at Justin) Ain't your name Justin??
Justin: No. My name is Hi...like Hello!
Me: Well, why do I think your name is Justin?
Justin: I don't know (laughing out loud along with the other people in the salon). It's not Justin (as he pulls out his driver license to prove it)...see it's Hai..like hi.
Me: (speechless. with a dumb ass look on my face)

VOICES IN MY HEAD

When I jumped up and decided I needed (yes, need - not want) Hai to put his hands on my feet and calves, I knew it was a purchase Suze wouldn't approve. As a matter of fact, as I was driving home, I heard Suze some more telling me I had no business spending money on a pedicure. Sometimes Suze needs to be ignored. This was one of those times. The last thing I want to do is feel guilty about spending $30. My time would be better spent figuring out how I'm gonna make that $30 back.

I think this is one of those instances where over-indulgent people would make the "you only live once" comment. Baby Daddy got the internet turned back on. I felt it was my duty to show my appreciation by getting my feet did.

Chronicles from The Crackhouse: Day 3

Let me start off by saying this can get really really expensive! God knew what He was doing when He told Dr. Gupta to give me that gift card. I thank them both...kindly. 

I clocked in this morning around 8am and was able to get my other corner office. 

Patrick must spend the night in this place. He always manages to get the most valued piece of real estate. Yes - Patrick is his real name. Don't you know your coworkers on a first-name basis?! Looking at how his cube is set up, I can guess where his headquarters is located. Hint: rhymes with Hell. I tried to take a picture of it while he was on smoke break, but it didn't come out good. Sorry.

ALL-HANDS OFF-SITE

Whenever I think about the place that rhymes with Hell, lame buzzwords immediately come to mind. Corporate jargon makes me cringe. I'm meeting some friends for dinner this evening. Doesn't that sound better than, "I have an all-hands off-site tonight"?

My friend's mom is in town visiting. Long before she got here, she sent me a note on Facebook letting me know she wanted to meet me. I didn't ask why. Decided it would be more appropriate to ask when we meet. I'm really looking forward to hearing what Ms. Pearl has to say. She's retired and spends time volunteering at a school reading to kids and helping with their homework. An example of how your golden years should be spent.

Since I won't be at Headquarters after-hours, I had to get here early before The Boy and The Girl start pinging me asking when I'm going to circle back with them. No matter how task driven I may be, they always seem to stay in my pipeline.

360 DEGREE FEEDBACK

When The Girl and I went on our walk last night, I asked her how she felt about me going across town holding up a sign saying, 'Need Help!':

Her: Mom - no, that's not right. There are really people who need help.
Me: I know - you're lookin' at one of em. 

I didn't have the bandwidth to pushback. It might be in everyone's best interest to refocus and ramp up my productivity or possibly consider rolling out a new paradigm shift.

It's tabled for now. A good segue for me to take it offline.

And in case you just stumbled upon this and have no idea what's going on, Views from The Crackhouse will bring you up to speed.

Today's Video: The Good, the Bad & the Marketing Ugly

I drive past this place regularly. As much as I love food, nothing about this sign makes me want to go in and try it:

If you can't see the video CLICK HERE.



The Girl & The Boy came along when I shot this one...they got nervous when people started coming outside to see what was going on.

Views from The Crackhouse

 

This is my cubicle today, right now as I type this blog post. It's a well known coffee shop. I affectionately refer to it as The Crackhouse.

Why? Internet service at Headquarters has been disconnected. No, not due to technical difficulties, but financial difficulties. They send a technician out for one. Not the other.

Someone is going to read this and relate to it. They'll appreciate my honesty and see themselves having been in a similar situation. Someone else will read this and be judgmental. They'll determine what they think about me as a person based solely on this. They'll have all kinds of unsolicited advice. Much of which will equate to, "Get a job!".

Let me share a little secret with you: I know people with TWO jobs who can't pay their bills!

DOWNWARD SPIRAL

There are over 14 million unemployed Americans. There were 18,000 jobs created in June. The math is simple. Sad, yet simple.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. I'm not trying to get folks to abandon their job search. I want people to realize job creation isn't the answer. And it never will be.  The individuals who survive this "new economy" will be those who create their own opportunities. They need information, resources, and support in order to do so. 

Not everyone is cut out to be their own boss. We need worker bees to make the world go 'round. The problem is that companies are phasing out humans and using technology in their places. End result: lower paying positions which leads to under-employment and survival jobs just so they can eat. Not to get by or get ahead. But to provide basic necessities.

STOP SAYING YOU'RE FINE

Mel Robbins wrote the book. Seriously. It's the name of her book. In other words, stop lying about what's going on in your life. I can't tell you the number of times I've been at a networking event with women and everyone is doing fine...business is booming...more clients than they can handle...ready to bring on employees.

When they corner me alone, I get the real low down. They're struggling. Going back and forth with going back to work or forging ahead on their entrepreneurial journey.

If Katy Perry's car was repossessed before she was 'Katy Perry' why the hell should I walk around with my head hanging down because my internet was cut off? Tyler Perry slept in his car. He was homeless. We all know how that story ended. 

When I watched Pursuit of Happyness yesterday, I reflected on a statement Chris Gardner made. He summed up his internship as, "no salary...not even a reasonable promise of a job." I guess I'm sort of interning for myself right now. Despite the overwhelming obstacles he faced, he kept going. Doing whatever he had to do along the way. This movie has to be the best portrayal of real life I've ever seen. Mr. Gardner's success didn't come as a result of him buying a high-priced info product or by going on an exclusive member only six figure retreat. It came the way it should. By staying the course. Even when it didn't make sense to anyone else. He kept going.

PLAN B

For the average person, it might be to start a business - maybe. My Plan B is going to work for someone else - on a part time basis. As long as I'm not asking you to pay my bills, don't question why.

Several times a week I come across an article written by an expert telling people to close up shop if they aren't making any money. Trying to convince them that their business isn't a real business - it's a money sucking hobby. 

What. The Hell. Ever!

Didn't we learn a thing or two about armchair quarterbacking from the Casey Anthony trial?!

Work your plan until you can't work it anymore. Explore every possible option in the book. Do not allow yourself or anyone else to define you by your circumstances - past or present. 

If all else fails, feel free to invite the critics to kiss your ass.

An Offer I Had to Refuse

If you have any kind of an online presence, at some point you'll receive a pitiful piece of communication resembling the following.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * 

To Whom it May Concern,

I'm the affiliate manager for JoeDate.com, the Internet's newest Online Dating Website. We have just launched our new Affiliate Program and we are offering our affiliate partners a very generous 50% commission on all referred sales. This is the highest paying affiliate program of any dating website on the internet! Because our site is so affordable (lifetime memberships are only $49.95) the conversion rate for our membership is very high.

If you would consider partnering with us to promote our site please take a moment to visit the following url to select various banners and text links that can be used for promotion.

http://www.joedate.com/affiliates.php

Partnering with us is a great way to earn an extra revenue stream from your website and you can easily track your daily traffic and sales stats from your affiliate control panel.

If you have any questions about our affiliate program or our website, feel free to contact me anytime to discuss. We can also give you some promotion tips if you want to make the most possible sales from promoting our website.

I look forward to hearing from you!

Sincerely,

Affiliate Manager

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Memo to Mr. Total Turnoff: Thanks, but no thanks. Your sad salutation lets me know you didn't bother to read this before you found my email address and polluted my inbox. I may be mild-to-moderately broke, but I sure as hell ain't desperate. 

As such, it is with much delight that I say this (in my best Suze Orman voice):

You have been DEEEENIED!

Thank you Kindly,

Management.