the journey to becoming an overnight success

i came across a very inspirational story on twitter about a make-up artist in pursuit of her dreams. 

if you can't see the video CLICK HERE.

no matter what industry you're in, if there's something you've been striving for, but just can't seem to get it - this is for you. read Tatiana's full story on Necole Bitchie's blog.

Donnaism

If this ends up making sense, it was pure luck. Not planned whatsoever. That's what happens when you sit down with a Cinnamon Dolce Latte and start click-clackin'. The rest of the world calls it typing, but not my oldest sister. To her, I'm click-clackin'.

One of my faithful and supportive readers, The Numbers Whisperer, gets a kick out of my southern idioms. Although I'm not the first to have said, "Shut your mouth wide open!" or "It's hotter than fish grease!", she refers to them as Donna-isms. And being the twitter-addicted blogger I am, I've claimed the phrase appropriately by making it a hashtag.

The other day I tweeted this one:

don't force it. whatever IT is. #donnaism

(sidenote: I just wasted about 17 minutes of my life trying to figure out how to embed a tweet. I can't get those 17 minutes back. Ever.)

@MicheleDortch retweeted it and said she needed to hear that. You're welcome, Michele.

If you're still reading - thank you. I think I'm about to make a point.

I really could've forced out a themed topic relating to Christmas that probably would've made some sense. But I didn't want to. Instead, I waited to write. I'm allowing the words to just flow. However they're popping into my head is how they're being click-clacked.

As I continue to evolve, I'm making a conscience effort to not force it. Nothing that was ever forced felt good.

While people are resolving to not have resolutions and to be intentional without setting goals or whatever the popular thing is going into 2012, this is what I'm going to focus on. And my three words from last year of course.

If you don't do anything differently in the new year,

give yourself permission to just be.

Naturally. Whoever you are.

Don't feel obligated to meet anyone's expectations other than your own. But do yourself a favor in the process. Raise the bar.

I appreciate you putting up with me yet another year. Thank you for reading and sharing your feelings. I'm grateful for every single social media mention, comment, and most importantly for you telling someone about my blog and inviting them to the party.

I can't promise you anything other than to keep giving you the truth.

Honestly uncontrived.

That is how I choose to be.

Title This Whatever You Want

I tweeted this post and @asummermoon replied:

@iHiredMe wow that's great congrats...btw love the frank advice and down to earth nature you present on your blog

 Lynn Davis
@asummermoon

Thank you, Lynn.

1. It took me forever to figure out how to get that screensot image thingy on here. Huge technological advancement for The Unemployed Entrepreneur®.
2. It took me longer than I care to admit to get to the point of being frank. I have no problems in this area in real life, but for some reason it was a challenge here.
3. The reason it was a challenge is because I was treating my blog a little bit differently than I do real life - kind of. I've figured that much out - I think.
4. This is my blog. Period. I can make it whatever I want it to be. I can write about whatever I want to write about. No matter how much the experts tell me I'm supposed to focus on one thing. 
5. I'm not one dimensional, therefore, one focus doesn't work for me. One focus is like fitting into one box. I don't do boxes. Unless they're round - like a hat box. The box most people don't think about when you bring up the word "box". 
6. My blog won't appeal to everyone and I don't want it to. If it did, that would make it one dimensional.
7. Advice varies. What you would tell someone may not be the same as what the person next to you would suggest. I give advice based on my own experiences and would never tell someone to do something I wouldn't do myself. 
8. Being me is easy. It doesn't take any extra effort on my part. I wake up and show up and my job is done. I'm a deep thinker, but being me requires the least amount of thought.
9. Thought takes a back seat to action in my world. Thinking deep doesn't mean shit if you aren't willing to roll up your sleeves, get your shovel out, and dig half as deep as you allow yourself to over analyze.
10. As much as I appreciate you taking the time to read, comment, tweet, and Facebook, I'd turn cartwheels if you actually got up and decided to do something - not for me - but for yourself.

Are Lies Holding You Back?: A Post for The Work at Home Woman

Are self-defeating thoughts and actions preventing you from being your best?
Have you conditioned yourself to believe you'll never get ahead and enjoy the life you deserve?

Take a look at my recent post for The Work at Home Woman and see if this describes you or someone you know:

6 Lies You Must Stop Telling Yourself

Truth: Self-Explanatory

This one speaks volumes and is TRULY worth a thousand words...literally.

Photo credit: Brothersoft

Don't Lose Your Voice

Yeah, the picture is a bit graphic but you get the point don't you? This is how some people would like to see us - unable to speak and without a voice.

An interesting thing happened this week on air during my radio show. I made a comment that offended some listeners and they didn't waste time calling in to let me know. We were talking about the man in Florida who went into the school board meeting and started shooting. He didn't injure anyone, but was shot by security and then turned the gun on himself. His wife later made a statement saying he was bipolar. I said he was crazy.

I brought up the fact that so many criminals are now using bipolar disorder as a reason for "snapping" and breaking the law. By no means was I grouping everyone with a mental illness in this category. The category with crazy criminals.

SELECTIVE HEARING

Some listeners took my comment totally out of context and said I was making light of a very serious situation. Not true at all. They heard what they wanted to hear and drew their own conclusions. Has this ever happened to you?

DIFFERENCES IN PERCECPTION

Other listeners called in to say they understood my point and felt the same way. That anyone who went into a board room with a loaded gun was crazy. One caller even went so far as to tell me live on air that he was calling to give me an opportunity to retract what I said. Huh? Seriously?

This kind of thing happens all the time with celebrities and public figures. They make a statement, a group gets pissed off, and then they're bullied into apologizing. Well let me tell you something: it ain't happening here. I said what I meant and I meant what I said. I politely (in the most stern way I possibly could) told the listener I respected his opinion and point of view and all I ask is that he respect mine. Respecting and agreeing are two completely different things.

DON'T BE SILENCED

I'm on the radio and I write to have a voice. A voice that's mine. A voice that won't be manipulated and controlled by people who take things way too seriously and misconstrue my message.

Don't allow anyone to take your voice. Don't allow anyone to put words in your mouth. You have the right to speak your mind. Having said that, you don't have the right to disrespect the person next to you. Healthy debate is a good thing. The world would be a boring place if we all believed the same thing and communicated the same way.

Be your authentic self. Just know when you do, you'll sometimes be misunderstood.

Photo credit: izthistaken

21 QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF

1.  What can I do today to improve my tomorrow?

2.  How many negative thoughts have I had in the past 24 hours?

3.  What toxic people do I need to let go of?

4.  What's my definition of success?

5.  When will I stop making excuses?
 

6.  How can others see the best in me if I refuse to do so myself?

7.  How many hours will I spend on personal development?

8.  How can I reach new heights...and stay there?

9.  Who can I bring with me on my journey to success?

10. When was the last time I performed a random act of kindness?

11. What would happen if I replaced "I'm trying" with "I'm doing"?

12.  When will I realize I deserve more than I'm settling for?

13. How many times did I say "thank you" today?

14. What would I do if I wasn't afraid of being judged?

15. Do I only find joy in material things?

16. Are my words speaking louder than my actions?

17. Am I defined by the opinions of others?

18. When will I get a backbone and start saying "NO!"?

19. When will I stop letting my past determine my future?

20. When will I hold myself accountable?

21. Am I really pleased with the person in the mirror?





Photo credit: lovesteph83

Feel the Fear, Have Doubts & Do it Anyway

I was searching for an image that depicted someone being afraid and despite feeling the fear, they chose to "do the thing " anyway. This photo is a good representation of not only that, but of how I personally feel at times.

More often than not, when I make up my mind to do something, I really don't have a clue how to go about doing it. I'm sometimes fearful, rarely have a comprehensive plan in place, am a bit worried about being judged or how the idea will be received by others, but yet and still I do it anyway. I give myself permission to have all of those conflicting emotions - the negative ones that usually hold others back from reaching forward into the unknown. In case you didn't know, that's what we're resisting. Moving outside of what's comfortable and into territory we've never explored.

If you only take away one thing from reading this, let it be the following: If what you're doing doesn't make you uneasy, it's probably not worth doing.

Complacency is akin to comfort. Comfort is related to stagnation. Stagnation mirrors conformity. None of which are breeding grounds for prosperity, growth, responsibility, or success.

I couldn't encourage you to dream big and then make it happen unless I was actually doing it myself. Well, I guess I could but I wouldn't be taken seriously and I certainly wouldn't be leading by example.

The point I'm trying to make here is simple. We experience a range of positive and negative emotions and thoughts. It's ok. What's not ok is when we become paralyzed by the negative - anything and everything from the distracting little voices in our heads to the very people in our circle of influence who shoot down our dreams for no reason other than they too have the same reservations but don't know how to manage and overcome them.

Tell the voices to shut up and get yourself some new friends. I suggest you do this sooner rather than later. The more you procrastinate the more it costs you. Wouldn't you rather have a small group of people who build you up and support you unconditionally rather than a large network of Naysaying Nellies?

Stop settling for less than you deserve because you're guided by fear and can't see beyond the seemingly impossible. Let your fears motivate you. Embrace them and allow yourself to evolve into someone you never imagined you could be.


Photo credit: Marlene Ford

Don’t Retool - Reinvent for a Better Future

I had the privilege of speaking to a large group of unemployed professionals last year and the talk was centered around reinvention. I decided that now is a good time to bring this to light again since the U.S. is still facing record high numbers of unemployment.

The word “retool” has been thrown around in panel discussions and interviews with corporate CEO’s (President Obama has even referenced it a time or two) who offer advice to out of work Americans. For most people, this isn’t about updating or improving – it’s about starting over.

The message I delivered to my audience resonated with them because I opened up and shared my personal story – a story that closely mirrored their current situation. I talked about being laid off twice within one year (to no fault of my own) and the uncertainty I felt when I didn’t have a job. But despite those things, I looked at that time in my life as an opportunity to renew myself and follow my dreams. Thus, DonnaSpeaks.com was born and here I am today as The Unemployed Entrepreneur™. Never again would I be faced with having all my eggs in one basket by having only one source of income.

reinvent (v): to make over completely; to recast something familiar or old into a different form

I’d always known my life’s purpose extended far beyond the titles others had given me. I have gifts and talents that are meant to be shared with all who desire to reach their greatness and live out their missions. It is my resilience that has kept me going. You see, it’s not the obstacles or challenges we face that keep us from succeeding. It’s our inability or unwillingness to learn from those things that allow us to be defeated.

resilience (adj): the ability to recover quickly from illness, change, or misfortune

You have to decide what it is that you want - clearly and vividly. Once you know what that looks like, you then have to get up and take action to get you there. Start your journey knowing that you may not have all the answers and you may have to change direction along the way, but commit to not giving up. Let each experience, both good and bad, serve as a lesson to prepare you for what’s to come.

Reinvention is a never ending process. It’s the daily, on-going pursuit of personal growth and fulfillment – a path that ultimately leads to more rewards and greater responsibilities.

Photo credit: CamilaGama

Don't Be Blinded by The Truth

From time to time, I get calls from people who want to vent. In most cases, it’s usually about someone close to them revealing their true selves. A friend who is starting to behave more like a wishy-washy acquaintance instead of the honest person you thought they were when you first met.

In almost all cases, the person venting has started to make positive changes in their lives. They’ve become more focused on self-wealth, career developments, furthering their education, and just letting go of bad habits and replacing them with new ones.

Listen...when you decide to do things differently, you’re going to lose some friends. It happens in life and in business. I experience it all the time. There are some folks who smile in my face, send me tweets and emails but could really care less if I succeed. They stay close to me to see what I’m doing, how I’m doing it, and how they can mirror what I’m doing without it being obvious that they’re really stealing my stuff. It used to get under my skin, but now I look at it as a form of flattery. You can try to copy my creativity all day long, but you’ll never be me. We don’t have the same vision. Mine is bigger than you can imagine and I work fearlessly to make it a reality.

I’ve been looked at and judged my entire life. My mama often told me, “If people aren’t talking about you, then you must be doing something wrong!”

The truth of the matter is that these people are showing you who they really are. They’re being their authentic selves. We’ve become accustomed to the word “authentic” being used to describe someone who is real, down to earth, and positive. However, when someone stabs you in the back, they are an authentic back-stabber.

Keep doing what you do to the best of your abilities. Embrace the people around you who show unconditional love and support. Surround yourself with like-minded people who don’t just say they want more out of life, but actually get up and do something to make it happen.

I strive daily to fulfill my mission: to globally represent what the everyday woman can overcome and become when you begin to love yourself, define your passion, and serve others.

"The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them."  — Maya Angelou

How do you handle naysayers? I could definitely use some pointers in this area.

Photo credit: lorrainemd